Weekend Recap...

G'morning Kids & Porn Stars.... Happy Monday - OK, not really. Where do I begin? My boss is an a-hole. Last Thursday I had to work from home because the Honda people were coming to inspect my car and they gave me a time frame of 12-5. How nice. Instead of driving in to the office and working from 8:30-11:30 I just stayed home. (Of course DB stopped by on his way home - awwwwe). My boss STILL hasn't signed my time off request. So, as you can imagine, I'm annoyed with him. Then all day he gave me attitude via e-mail. F him. After working all day for his attitude, I had to work at 32.

P.S. - The Honda guy showed up 10 minutes after I fell asleep on my lunch hour. I was SO annoyed!

Friday - Woke up feeling like crap. I'd had a headache (migraine) for 2 days straight and was NOT in the mood for the boss (DM). When I got to the office, I couldn't handle it. I needed to leave. So, an hour later I was on my way home. I decided, F Him - he can deal with my clients for the day. I couldn't even hold my head up. On my way home, I broke down and started crying. Hysterically, like a baby. It was uncontrollable. I was glad when I got home. I popped a Valium and slept like a baby. I wound up staying in all night - DB stopped by before work to check in on me and The Bunny called / text messaged me most of the night to check in.

Saturday - Woke up to DB's text that he was on his way over. He came by for about an hour to see how I was doing. After he left, I get a text from The Bunny, "Call me ASAP." It was 9:30 AM. The Bunny is NEVER awake that early on a Saturday. I call her. "I'm in The 'Burg. Couldn't drive last night. My car is at Rhodes." She laughs. I laugh. I wound up going to pick her up. She wasn't in The 'Burg. LOL. She was actually 10 or so minutes outside of The 'Burg. I circled around a bit looking for her. When I finally found her - standing on 17 LOL - we went to get some bagels and chatted for a bit. I finally dropped her at her car and went home. We made plans to get our nails done after 3 and we were off. 3 came and The Bunny was too hungover to go out. I can't say I wasn't pissed. I was. I waited 4 hours for her to get some rest, so PMS reared it's ugly head and I was mad. I wound up staying in Saturday night just relaxing and watching movies. DB stopped by again before work and then I was off to dreamland again.

Sunday - Mama Dukes had her shopping face on so that's what we did. For 3 long hours. I made out like a bandit on Mama Dukes dime, so I can't complain. :)

So, here I am at work again. I can't tell you how miserably depressed I am working here. The only good thing is, I put name in the running for a new position here. I'm hoping it comes through as it would open A LOT of doors for me. My boss has still yet to approve my vacation time, so it looks like I won't be going to Winkie's wedding. I am NOT happy. Wednesday at lunch I start this volunteer program I am getting into. I am going to be a volunteer counselor. I am hoping it will open my eyes to see if it is really something I want to get into... And if it is, I hope it counts as an internship when I do finally get my a** back into school! :) Tonight I am dropping Kelly (My Accord) off at Honda. It's going to be a sad day :( Although I am still loving my new ride (dent and all). Things with DB are going well. I hate to say it was The Bunny that caused our fights because I really don't believe that - but, as I said things are going pretty well. LOL. (Sorry Bunny). The only good thing now is that The Bunny and I no longer hold anything back - we just say what's on our mind. I think all of this might have made us closer. I just wish everything could be simple again. Maybe one day. Anyway, I am off for now, I guess I should take advantage of my boss being out of the office so I can get stuff done without him bothering me. 10-4 over and out.

Weekend Recap....

G'morning Kids & Porn Stars. Happy Monday. Caution, long post ahead.

So, let me start off with some good news. I went down the the Jersey shore Friday afternoon with Mama Dukes to see my brothers. We needed to get a bunch of paperwork signed and what not for our stocks and it feels good to finally have a huge chunk of this issue taken care of. It also felt good to know that my father kind of took care of us by buying into these stocks. Briberry and I made out pretty well and it feels good. It was also nice to spend the day with Mama Dukes - the two hour ride there and back gave us some time to catch up. I also took her out for her birthday dinner (her birthday is today). (Shut up RyRy, but we went to Charlie Brown's, LOL. The salad bar was AWESOME.) Briberry was decent to me - smiled and was pleasant. The other Brother (not to be confused with "The Other Sister," because he's not retarded, but you might not know it by looking at him), was a prick. An all out, first class, a-hole. He wouldn't look at my mother or eye, talk to us, or even SIT near us. Honestly, is it really worth all this because of money?? Grow-up already.

When we got home, I napped for a bit since it was a long day (working in the AM, driving for 4 hours, and dealing with the brothers... It was stressful.) Around 11 I headed over to Casa to see DB play. It was DB's and my 6 month anniversary and Casa is where we met. He sent a BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers to my job in the AM. He's being very sweet lately. I stayed about an hour and watched him... Then I headed over to 32. I thought for sure The Bunny would show up - at least for a drink - but she didn't. I chatted with Irish Boy and had a drink while I waited for DB to finish up. As I was sitting there - semi incognito - the new girl was talking about how she "loves" working at 32. We'll call her BG (Bohemian Girl.) She had no clue I was sitting there. "I just love working here. It's the best place I've ever worked," she goes on and on to Irish Boy. Obviously kissing his ass. "I just love everyone that works here. Except Bethany." Hahahaha.... Irish Boy says, "Well, Bethany is right there," and points to me. She almost died. "I, I, I, didn't mean it like that....," she stammers as she tried to explain herself to me. "Stop," I say. "I don't care. I don't care about you. I don't like you. Only speak to me when spoken to." Then I turn my back to her. What a moron. LOL. I left shortly after and met up with DB at my house. We hung out until the wee hours (AKA, until I fell asleep, LOL).

Saturday - Woke up and lounged for most of the day. Chatted with Doogie online and then we decided to meet up at the mall for some eats and a chat. I raced around getting the nails done and what not then met him at The Outback. We spent some time there having some yummy foods and chatting away. It's always good to hear his perspective on things. He's so laid back since he got home and always has good comedic effect. :) After lunch, we headed to Barnes & Noble and checked out some books. I needed to get home soon after so we hugged and said good-bye. After I fed the pooches, I lounged around some more and then decided I was going to go to the movies - whether I had someone to go with or not. No one wanted to go, so I headed out and got to enjoy Zodiac all by my lonesome. It felt good to not have to worry about whether anyone else wanted to see it, listen to them talk, have to find two good seats.... I settled in and enjoyed the THREE hour movie all alone. It was a great flick! Definitely too long though, LOL. After the movie I headed over to DB's gig right near my house and sat in on the last 3 songs. As much as I hate the music (LOL), they sounded good and he made me proud :). I talked to him for a few then went back to my house. He came over a little while later and we relaxed and watched t.v. until I (once again) fell asleep.

Sunday - Mama Dukes headed off to AC with her her BFF. I had the house to myself, ahhh. I got so much done and it felt good! DB came over at night, we watched Waiting and cuddled. All in all, a nice weekend. 10-4 over and out.

Making Choices....

Hi Kids & Porn Stars..... It's almost 4:30 AM on Sunday morning and what started out as a great weekend, turned into hell.

On Friday, contrary to what some people thought (ahem, Flirt! LOL), I did get a raise. 5% - which, for my company is pretty damn good. It's about $2K more a year, which isn't much, but every little bit helps. After work I ran a bunch of errands and got a lot done. I got to see RyRy really quick and then raced down to the 'Burg to meet DB for dinner. Dinner was nice and I was really looking forward to seeing his band play and hanging out with The Bunny. After dinner, I raced home and rested for a bit. Then I got ready and headed back to the 'Burg. The Bunny was already there and the band was on a break. DB's dad was there and I, of course, got the stare down. But this time I was stronger and ignored it. The night flew by and things were going well. I got to meet a friend of The Bunny's. The band wrapped up around 2AM and we decided to head over to 32while DB packed up. We got there and the staff was being a little obnoxious. For people I work with, I was a little irritated by their behavior. Regardless, DB showed up, and the two were getting along. Things seemed to be going well. Bunny decided to sleep over, she had what I thought was too much to drink and drive. 4AM came and it was time to go (rather, we got thrown out, but that's a story for another time.) We headed home - me in my car and both of them in theirs. I get close to my house and DB calls me - "She kept going, she's driving home."I get to my house and he's there. "What can we do?," he asks. So I call her. Long story short, she decided to drive home and hung up on me. I didn't know what else to do, so I called her Mama Dukes. That's when it became my fault she was drinking - my Mama Dukes was angered by all this, DB was angry - things got way out of control. All because I wanted to help my friend.... My hands were tied. Some very harsh words came out of The Bunny's mothers mouth towards me. I fell asleep crying in DB's arms.

Saturday - Woke up late and had little time to make it to Erica's baby shower (I'm still in awe that she's having twin boys!!) The Bunny called and we talked. Her mother apologized. I told her we would talk more after the shower, I would come over for dinner. The shower went great - Erica got some fabulous gifts for the boys. I got to see Maggie Sue, Midge, AJ and the newest addition - Sydney :). Of course I was RIDICULOUSLY greedy and held Sydney as much as I could. She was way too adorable and I so want one. It was nice to see the girls - and being slightly hungover (and very exhausted) it was nice to be around so much food, LOL. At 4, we all headed out, Erica looked tired and had a TON of gifts to go through. I headed home and rested up for a bit. DB had a gig that night at cockroach heaven, but I wasn't in the mood for loud music and a crowd - and besides that, The Bunny promised me a home cooked meal. I headed to her place around 8 and we sat down to a yummy salad and some pasta. We talked and after eating we got comfortable on the couch and popped in Season 1 of SVU. DB messaged me asking if I was coming to the gig. I told him where I was. He responded with this, "You've got to be kidding me. Either she goes or I go. I'm done with the drama." At that point, I regretted telling him where I was. I really didn't want it to be this way - and through text. I went home and waited for him to call at the end of his gig. He waited until 3AM - on purpose. He knew I was sleeping by that point. He got very nasty with me - drove all the way to 32 - even though he was on the other side of the county - because he "needed a drink." He was being nasty and hung up on me. So I headed over to 32 and confronted him. "You are so predictable," he said. He then proceeded to tell me what "trash" my friend and her family is. And yelled about how I could want someone like her in my life. We walked out together, he stopped talking to me - he peeled out, swerving. So I followed him. We talked at some red lights, but he kept driving away, angrily. (Can we see a pattern here? He's drinking, I'm not. He's dramatic, I'm not??) Not that far out, I get pulled over. Coincidence? I think not. It was his friend JC. It was SSSOOO obvious DB called him and asked him to pull me over. Especially now since DB kept driving (and now claims he didn't know I got stopped. Hmmm, what gave it away - the flashing RED AND BLUE F-ing lights?? JC let me go - after saying some things that gave away his guilt - and I went home. I'd had enough.

Sunday - I didn't want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to be alone. DB calls while he's out and we talk more. He tells me he didn't know I got stopped but that JC messaged him that he owes him one. He had to quickly go and then we messaged back and forth the rest of the night. His second to last message was basically, "So your never talking to her again?" This was the only way he was going to talk to me again or come over. Then 10:30 comes around and all of a sudden he's tired and staying home.

I don't think I've ever in my whole life - this includes knowing The Bunny - had such a dramatic, insane, erratic relationship. I don't know what I'm supposed to do or think. Give up my friendship of almost 6 years for someone I've know for less than 6 months. Give up what I thought was the love of my life - but who insists on shutting me out every time he gets mad? I don't know. I'm confused, angry, upset and completely at a loss for words. I'm at the end of my rope here. 10-4 over and out.

Happy New Year....

G'morning Kids & Porn Stars.... Happy Tuesday, Happy New Year, Happy Four Day work week :). Things in my life.... Have changed. And it's only the 2nd. Where to begin?

Let me flashback to last week (if I leave things out, I’m sorry – my brain isn’t what it was 3 weeks ago):

Sunday – Christmas Eve. Drugged myself pretty good and then went to 32 with Kippy to visit The Bunny. Lee (the manager) is going through the same thing as me and hugged me several times and talked me through it. I wanted to get wasted, but something in my heart told me not to turn to that. It wasn’t right. We had planned on going to look at Christmas lights, but wound up staying at 32 the entire night. Earlier on, I asked The Bunny to stay the night with me. I couldn’t bear waking up alone :( She agreed. We all exchanged gifts and I got some rockin’ good gifts from my buddies. Kippy was acting kind of quiet and not acting like himself, so we kind of felt put out. We tried and tried to get him to smile and have a good time, but to no avail. The Bunny refused to let it ruin her night though and kept the party going. Maybe a little too much, lol. ;) Into the wee hours (actually, it was like 11:30), we took Kippy home and then went back to my house. The Bunny was hammered. It was funny and fun to watch, until Hot Rod upset it her and then the rest of the night was ruined because they kept fighting with one another. I finally passed out and woke up the next morning to a snoring Bunny. LOL.

Monday – Christmas was weird. It was just myself and Mama Dukes (after The Bunny left) this year and neither of us really had “the spirit.” We exchanged gifts and Mama Dukes rocked out with her gift giving this year. I don’t know if it was guilt, or what, but she kicked arse with her gifties to me. Weird, but I think this break up with DB brought us closer together. <3 We had some Turkey din-din, visited her BFF, and then went home and passed out. I had to be back to work on Tuesday AM (argh!)

Tuesday - The meds my doctor prescribed to help me “get over the hump” of my break up with DB helped, but they only kept me from crying. I was still “feeling” and I wanted that to stop. ASAP. I called out to the p/t job (32) because I had some kind of Bronchitis type of cold/flu/cough. I felt like I was dying. Then my Kel-Kel called and wanted to get me out of the house. (I love how everyone rallied to support me in my time of need. It was really awesome. I felt so alone and they made that feeling disappear. Thanks again everyone….) Kel-Kel took me out for “break up / comfort food.” AKA mozzarella sticks. We drove around and talked. She let me cry it out. We looked at the Elvis Christmas lights in NJ. It felt good to get it all out and hear her feedback. I was actually starting to feel better. After she dropped me off, I went inside and talked to Mama Dukes and then checked my e-mail. And there it was. And e-mail from DB. My heart pounded and I started to shake and sweat. I had been dying to hear from him for what seemed like and eternity and now here it was – the dreaded e-mail…. 1 day after Christmas. I wanted to read it so badly, but part of me didn’t. I clicked on it and it wasn’t pretty. I broke down and reverted back to the morning of the break up. It felt like I had been punched in the gut. I was hysterical and a HUGE mess. I called him and told him he could come and get his things, but I needed to know why. I needed closure. I called Kel-Kel who offered to drive back to my house (too sweet). I called The Bunny who was already on her way to Suffern. She stopped by my place first. I cried and sniffled and cried. I finally took a Valium and went to sleep. 11:30PM comes – I am passed out – and he calls. I checked my phone every second of every day when he wasn’t calling. And now there was his ring. My heart actually stopped. Mama Dukes ran to my room, “is it him??” I nodded yes. I answered. She closed my door and he and I talked for over and hour. Turns out, he was driving to my house and was outside for a small time. He wanted his things back. Then he wanted to come in to talk more. When he came in, I could see the love back in his eyes. He missed me. He saw what a mess I had become. We talked. We hugged. I cried. We talked about the possibility of getting back together. He left late and I fell fast asleep and finally slept well.

After than, we talked and e-mailed. I was so sick, I wound up leaving work early on Thursday and coming home sick on Friday. The Bunny filled in for me at 32 on Thursday night, I felt like I was dying.

Friday - DB stopped by Friday afternoon and we talked some more and got everything out in the open. It felt good to talk to him and even better to see him. I missed him so much. The break up really opened my eyes to what I want and don’t want and to how I really felt about “B.” The Bunny was coming over after work, so I told him to come by after his gig if he wanted to. When she arrived, we chilled and talked. I felt good again….. Whole if you will. We decided to head over to his gig (even though I was dying). It turned out to be a really great night. We headed out to Rhodes at 10-ish and DB was looking hot as he was playing. I made nice with his buddy FB. The Bunny got a little tipsy and made nice with a few people, LOL. She wound up meeting a REALLY nice guy – Gigs. The night went slow and fast all at once. It felt good to watch DB play and to feel at ease with him. Around 2:30, DB and I headed back to my house and I felt safe knowing that The Bunny was getting a ride home from either Gigs or Durkin. DB and I talked and really finally realized that we don’t want to live without one another. The Bunny came home at 8AM and woke me. We talked for a bit and she told me all about Gigs, then we passed back out.

Saturday – Cowgirl called in the AM. I hit the ignore button on the cell (sorry girl, but it was a friggin late night). Then she called the house. Then the cell again – I knew something was up because she would have just left a VM. She had a flat tire and needed my help with Triple AAA. So I got The Bunny out of bed and we headed down to NJ to help her out. A few hours later, we were finally getting some breakfast into our bellies and then ran all our errands. By the time we got back to my place, we wanted nothing to do with going anywhere. We showered (separately Animals) and went back to bed to watch movies. DB stopped by before work and then The Bunny and I were off to dream land.

Sunday – Woke up early and then we went back to sleep. LOL. We knew we had to get some errands done though. I died The Bunny’s hair (it looks healthier, shinier, but kind of the same color. LOL). We shopped for the evening shin-dig. We still didn’t have a final count. Both of us knew in our guts that the night would bring drama, we just weren’t sure how much. DB stopped by briefly and Mama Dukes headed out to her work party as we prepared for the night. A few minutes to 9, Kippy showed up. Already there was tension in the air. Shortly after, Gigs showed up. We all started drinking and playing some different board games I had. Things were going smoothly besides the tension. Tempers flared shortly after the ball dropped and Gigs and Kippy got into it. The Bunny fessed up to dating Gigs and Kippy was heartbroken. Mama Dukes came home and said it was time for the party to be over, so Kippy headed home. DB showed up and we all wound up talking in the kitchen. Mama Dukes and DB made their peace and so did The Bunny and DB. It was all a lot of drama for Gigs to handle for a first night out, but he handled it well.

The New Year has brought about a lot of good changes. And it has a promise of good things to come. I feel good, I'm happy, I'm in love, Doogie is home, Maggie Sue had a baby, The Bunny is back in my life, Cowgirl and I are closer than ever, Kel-Kel is once again like a sister.... Things feel good. I wish everyone a great New Year and all the joys and promises 2007 should bring. Bethany is back.... 10-4 over and out.

Sexually Harassed.... At Home Depot?

G'morning Kids & Porn Stars.... Happy Tuesday. Let me recap the weekend so you can understand why I was harassed at a Home Depot last night (there's always a story, lol).

Friday night The Bunny came to pick me up and we headed over to the mall to see The Holiday. GREAT chick flick. I loved it.

Saturday - headed over to the part time job for my 10AM shift :(. It was a long and tiring day and I only made $35 in tips, but they paid me for my time which rocked. So overall for the day I did well. DB came over later that night and it was nice to see him after not seeing him for almost 2 days.

Sunday when I woke up I felt like I was 90 years old. It's been a while since I waitressed and I need to get used to it all over again, lol. I planned on getting the rest of my stuff out of storage and I had a big crew recruited to help :). Kel-Kel, Kippy, The Bunny, and Bunny's Papa Dukes all came out - with trucks! The whole process didn't take long, but it was a sweaty ordeal. by 6:30 I had my bed set up and we were all done. After that, Mama Dukes took me to dinner for some eats and then DB came by later on that night. As we were laying there watching t.v., BANG! My bed fell apart. LOL. DB got it back together for me and we thought all was well. He left shortly after for work and I passed out. 4AM comes around and - BANG! - my bed falls apart again! Argh! The wood frame has wooden slats on the bottom to hold the matress and box spring up and one piece is warped... So it keeps falling apart. :(

So last night, The Bunny came to pick me up and we went to the 'Mill and got some eats and chatted it up with the bartender about the Kramer situation, lol, and giving birth. That was enough to make me stop eating, so we then headed over to The Home Depot to get new wooden slats. We walked around looking for "wood" and finally came across the Lumber department. This guy called over to the Lumber guy, "Hey Jay, I'm sending over two BEAUTIFUL customers for you to help." The guy cut two pieces for me and we went back to the first guy to pay. As we were standing there, a mentally challenged cart pusher came up behind us and the cashier yells to him to "stop looking at" our "hot asses." Ummmmmm, OK, he's retarded. The cart guy gets all embarrassed and blushes and then yells at the cashier. "I I I I wasssssn't looking at their bbbbbutts. Stttttop saying that." Poor thing. The cashier continued to make comments as we walked out, but seriously, who does that?? LOL. We got back to my place and fixed my bed and then The Bunny was oof. DB came over later and we watched t.v. in my comfy bed. It was a nice night with him although he *tried* to start a fight with me, lol.

Tonight it's off to work after work. Fun-fun. DB will be there with a bunch of his co-workers for a squad party, so at least I will get to see him... I'm off to get some work done here. They had major layoffs at our sister company yesterday, so I need to keep myself in check so I'm not next :( 10-4 over and out.