I'm Hurt....

....And I don't know how to feel other than numb right now. I am sitting at my desk, lump in my throat, ready to breakdown in tears, but I know I can't because.... I am at work and it would be so unprofessional.
I was just dumped. Again. By "Harrison." Last Friday night we had (what I thought) a really great night. I didn't call him for a few days because everyone does that game thing. I called him last night and his phone was off, so I left a VM. Today he sent me the following e-mail:
"I need to talk to you soon about us.
I feel that you will not like what I have to say.
I will call you.

-Harrison"
That was it. He sends me this at work. So I call his cell, it's off. I call him at work, I leave a VM. I write back, "Why would you send me this at work and do this through e-mail??" Then I call his cell again and we talk. He tells me that his heart is with his ex, they talked over the weekend, she wants to get back with him, and that's where is heart is. He tells me he cares about me and that's what makes this so hard and how he didn't really want to do this over the phone or through e-mail. BUT HE DID. And for that, I lose respect in him. I'm not sure what to think or feel other than numb right now. We are still going to be friends, but how is that possible? My gut is telling me it isn't over, but it still doesn't keep me from hurting right now. A few months ago, my mom gave me a prayer box. To pray for things, talk to God, whatever. So, on this box I prayed for "Harrison" to stop hurting over his ex. I gave a box to my new friend The OC. So, after I got off the phone with him, I told her the box doesn't work. This is what she said:
"Bethany,
Re-read the paper in the box. Everything happens in God's time, not our time. He doesn't give us everything we want. He knows the whole future and certain things we are sure we want may not be good for us or may hurt us. Don't be sad. Enjoy the time you had with "Harrison", in the interim, your mate may not be accessible if you are tied up with "Harrison". Trust God, I do. Have fun with "B". Walking will be good for you today.:-)

The OC"
She made me feel better, but I still have this lump. 10-4 over and out - 7 hours to go until I get out of this hell pit I call work.