Making Choices....

Hi Kids & Porn Stars..... It's almost 4:30 AM on Sunday morning and what started out as a great weekend, turned into hell.

On Friday, contrary to what some people thought (ahem, Flirt! LOL), I did get a raise. 5% - which, for my company is pretty damn good. It's about $2K more a year, which isn't much, but every little bit helps. After work I ran a bunch of errands and got a lot done. I got to see RyRy really quick and then raced down to the 'Burg to meet DB for dinner. Dinner was nice and I was really looking forward to seeing his band play and hanging out with The Bunny. After dinner, I raced home and rested for a bit. Then I got ready and headed back to the 'Burg. The Bunny was already there and the band was on a break. DB's dad was there and I, of course, got the stare down. But this time I was stronger and ignored it. The night flew by and things were going well. I got to meet a friend of The Bunny's. The band wrapped up around 2AM and we decided to head over to 32while DB packed up. We got there and the staff was being a little obnoxious. For people I work with, I was a little irritated by their behavior. Regardless, DB showed up, and the two were getting along. Things seemed to be going well. Bunny decided to sleep over, she had what I thought was too much to drink and drive. 4AM came and it was time to go (rather, we got thrown out, but that's a story for another time.) We headed home - me in my car and both of them in theirs. I get close to my house and DB calls me - "She kept going, she's driving home."I get to my house and he's there. "What can we do?," he asks. So I call her. Long story short, she decided to drive home and hung up on me. I didn't know what else to do, so I called her Mama Dukes. That's when it became my fault she was drinking - my Mama Dukes was angered by all this, DB was angry - things got way out of control. All because I wanted to help my friend.... My hands were tied. Some very harsh words came out of The Bunny's mothers mouth towards me. I fell asleep crying in DB's arms.

Saturday - Woke up late and had little time to make it to Erica's baby shower (I'm still in awe that she's having twin boys!!) The Bunny called and we talked. Her mother apologized. I told her we would talk more after the shower, I would come over for dinner. The shower went great - Erica got some fabulous gifts for the boys. I got to see Maggie Sue, Midge, AJ and the newest addition - Sydney :). Of course I was RIDICULOUSLY greedy and held Sydney as much as I could. She was way too adorable and I so want one. It was nice to see the girls - and being slightly hungover (and very exhausted) it was nice to be around so much food, LOL. At 4, we all headed out, Erica looked tired and had a TON of gifts to go through. I headed home and rested up for a bit. DB had a gig that night at cockroach heaven, but I wasn't in the mood for loud music and a crowd - and besides that, The Bunny promised me a home cooked meal. I headed to her place around 8 and we sat down to a yummy salad and some pasta. We talked and after eating we got comfortable on the couch and popped in Season 1 of SVU. DB messaged me asking if I was coming to the gig. I told him where I was. He responded with this, "You've got to be kidding me. Either she goes or I go. I'm done with the drama." At that point, I regretted telling him where I was. I really didn't want it to be this way - and through text. I went home and waited for him to call at the end of his gig. He waited until 3AM - on purpose. He knew I was sleeping by that point. He got very nasty with me - drove all the way to 32 - even though he was on the other side of the county - because he "needed a drink." He was being nasty and hung up on me. So I headed over to 32 and confronted him. "You are so predictable," he said. He then proceeded to tell me what "trash" my friend and her family is. And yelled about how I could want someone like her in my life. We walked out together, he stopped talking to me - he peeled out, swerving. So I followed him. We talked at some red lights, but he kept driving away, angrily. (Can we see a pattern here? He's drinking, I'm not. He's dramatic, I'm not??) Not that far out, I get pulled over. Coincidence? I think not. It was his friend JC. It was SSSOOO obvious DB called him and asked him to pull me over. Especially now since DB kept driving (and now claims he didn't know I got stopped. Hmmm, what gave it away - the flashing RED AND BLUE F-ing lights?? JC let me go - after saying some things that gave away his guilt - and I went home. I'd had enough.

Sunday - I didn't want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to be alone. DB calls while he's out and we talk more. He tells me he didn't know I got stopped but that JC messaged him that he owes him one. He had to quickly go and then we messaged back and forth the rest of the night. His second to last message was basically, "So your never talking to her again?" This was the only way he was going to talk to me again or come over. Then 10:30 comes around and all of a sudden he's tired and staying home.

I don't think I've ever in my whole life - this includes knowing The Bunny - had such a dramatic, insane, erratic relationship. I don't know what I'm supposed to do or think. Give up my friendship of almost 6 years for someone I've know for less than 6 months. Give up what I thought was the love of my life - but who insists on shutting me out every time he gets mad? I don't know. I'm confused, angry, upset and completely at a loss for words. I'm at the end of my rope here. 10-4 over and out.