I Give Fairly Good Advice….

But, I don’t take it too well – I mean, if any one of my girlfriends were in the position I am in, I would tell them – scratch that – scream at them to leave. Immediately. I guess people can never see what other people can see. Am I different person now? Do I really have residual issues from my father’s absence and untimely death? I don’t know. I never really thought I did. You know what’s weird? I have only ever missed having a father – once. When I saw house close my co-worker was with her dad. I had a bad day at work, was PMSing and then got to see that. And I teared up. Other than that, it really just felt like I didn’t have a dad. And I was OK with it. I never knew what it was like to have a loving father, so how could I miss it? I always equated my “promisquity” as a teenager to the fact that I was REALLY HUGE and then Maggie Sue and I dropped a bunch of weight and I was making up for lost time. I never really thought it was because I “didn’t have a dad.” I know all psychologists feel that women get really f’d up from having an absentee father, but I can only imagine how f’d up I would have been had my parents stayed together. Besides, I know lots of women who have great fathers who “get around.” So why is this now becoming an issue? I know I get a little crazy at times (mostly when drinking, lol). I also know that everyone has their crazy moments, don’t they?

Anyway, I picked up Mica last Thursday night (Or Veronica, we can’t decide what to call my new car….) I spent Thursday night driving around with The Bunny, breaking her in. She is HOT – I love it. Not so good on the gas though, lol, but I finally have a “truck.” I will have pics up as soon as I can…. She isn’t completely broken in as of yet, there is nothing really personal in her yet besides Schmitty, my rearview mirror danglers, and some CD’s. I almost don’t feel as though she is really all mine yet…. Plus it’s weird having the Accord still in the driveway :( It’s hard to let her go – I had some good times in that car :) I’m enjoying driving my new car around town, although I feel VERY poor lately. Haha. I took back my third night at 32 (at least for this week) because I am in need of some cash flowage – ASAP. I don’t know how I am going to make it through 5 full days at WK and then 3 long nights at 32, but I will try my hardest to make due. We’ll see what happens. I might be dead by the weekend, LOL. Just kidding…..

My boss is out this week. Rumor is that some raises were given out this year. Not everyone is getting a raise. I am going to FLIP THE F**K out if I don’t get a raise. Especially since I asked for one, I DESERVE one, and I need one. My friend (I love her dearly) who told me she was getting a raise…. Well, she walks around endlessly during the day (don’t get me wrong, she gets her work done….), comes in late almost every day (and I’m not talking 10 minutes – I’m talking 30-60 minutes late daily), and she really doesn’t go above and beyond. They gave her 4%. Not much, but every little bit helps. If I don’t get one, I will really freak out. Her boss told her not to tell anyone about it because “not everyone is getting a raise this year.” WTF? 4% across the board would really kill them?? I’m fairly settled in here until I am in school and done with school, but seriously how long can a person go being kicked while they are already on the ground?? I’ve been sending out some resumes, but I don’t want to go too far as this may not be what I do for the rest of my life and would ideally like to remain in close commute to 32 and the school I am looking into. This is so frustrating…. Maybe I just really need a vacation. Ahhhhh, AZ. :)

It’s 10AM and I haven’t done anything work related. I think I’m a little too bitter about this raise thing. Maybe I should wait and make sure I definitely didn’t get one before I go on strike. LOL. 10-4 over and out!